Dear d30,
It’s been a very long while.
I am sorry that a lot of my past entries were lost due to time and negligence. I thought that the words I had written here were mostly insignificant and didn’t need archiving. I’ve realized that no matter how negligible I thought those ramblings were, they were still fragments of who I am. Sometimes it hurts(read: embarrassing) to read over the angst and confusion, but it is a very real part of adolescence; and a very real part of “growing up.”
I have come a long way since those first entries back in middle school. I pursued a career that I had never even considered, despite the fact that I spent all those hours, days and nights designing websites and layouts and graphics. I host meetups to bring the people I love together, because looking back on it, I realize how much I’ve always valued having people gathered in one place and just enjoying each others company. I have fought through the loneliness, the heaviness, and the darkness(those are not mutually exclusive to the teen years, though that is a conversation saved for another night), and am in a transitory stage of peace and understanding.
This is a place where I stayed true to myself, even if I didn’t understand the “what’s” or “why’s”. This is a place of expression, whether it was through words, pictures, design, or music. It’s been a very long while, but I hope that as I become more comfortable with who I am as a person, that I will again be comfortable with expressing myself.
xx, me